


one step at a time, just you and i

by dingletragedy



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: Anniversary, Attempt at Humor, Bubble Bath, Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Prison, Strangers to Lovers, Teen AU, Teen Romance, a lot of fluff and feelings, i honestly have no idea what i'm doing so cool, more arctic monkeys feels, my take on the reunion spoilers (a year too late), some arctic monkeys and the xx feels here, strangers meeting at a concert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2019-10-23 13:34:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 15,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17684450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dingletragedy/pseuds/dingletragedy
Summary: just a few prompts i was given on tumblr to test the waters with.# 21 - “you have no idea how much i want you right now.”





	1. shelter

It’s the middle of February; the night sky is dark, the air bitterly cold, and a heavy downpour has made its way over the bustling streets of Hotten. The rain is cool to the touch as it splashes off Aaron’s eyelashes and onto his cheeks, but he makes no attempt to shelter himself.

Why would he? This is exactly where he’s supposed to be - _**home**_. And Aaron, well, he’s spent months trying to find shelter in the arms of someone new. Someone nice and kind and too bloody perfect. And all of that, that he should crave, has just pushed him further into the arms of his ex-husband. _“_

_Hey, I can hear you thinking”_ Robert’s voice snaps him out of his thoughts, all hoarse and husky sounding as if he’s spent hours pouring his heart out. _He has_. They both have.

As Aaron detangles himself from Roberts embrace he wonders how many people have passed by while they’ve been lost in each other. Ten? Twenty? Hell, it could’ve been a hundred but it wouldn’t have made a difference to Aaron, not when it feels like they’re the only two people in the world. _“_

_Sorry”_ Aaron mutters, more to himself than to Robert. He’s sorry - sorry that it took him this long, sorry that he ever took that damn ring off, sorry that he’s so in love he’s blind to all others. But now isn’t the time to dwell on the past.

Not when Robert’s steady fingers wrap themselves around Aaron’s chin and tilt his head upwards. Aarons isn’t going to admit it out loud but he’s missed his husband’s hands, so much so that he takes the opportunity to entwine their free hands. The press of cold fingers and wet palms shouldn’t be such a comfort. And neither should Roberts eyes burning into his, full of love and admiration. It used to scare Aaron, make him want to run a mile - but now he basks in the attention - and it’s all he can do to lean up and fit his mouth with his husbands.

Roberts kisses are exactly how he remembers them; as warm as the rest of him. _“_

_I’ve missed you, Mr. Dingle”_ _“_

_Not as much as I’ve missed you, Mr. Sugden._ ”

And that’s when Aaron decides that he’d burrow himself into Robert if he could.


	2. under the lights of a thousand stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i was prompted robron & woods and this is what came of it!

Robert was only seventeen when he first fell in love, fresh out of school with no clue of the real world. It wasn’t what he expected from his first love. It was all whispered kisses, wet eyelashes, and fragile hearts. Much like a game of stolen moments.  _A game of Aaron._

Roberts borrowed his Dad’s van,  _well if you can count sneakily swiping his keys while he was having a kip, as borrowing_. He’d picked Aaron up (who was under the illusion they were just going to the burger place, as per) and he’d driven them to a secluded woods, it really shouldn’t be as romantic as it is.

But Roberts decked the back of the van out with pillows, blankets and a string of fairy lights hasn’t he? It’s sickening really - like something from the films that Vic forces him to watch with her - but Aaron makes Robert feel seasick.

This is his idea of whisking Aaron away for the night, it’s not exactly ideal but his farm wage won’t quite cover the luxurious hotels he sees in his dreams, not with his Dad decking his wages every time he skives off. Can you blame him though? He hates that job, hates the life that everybody wants for him,  _everybody except himself._ He’s always been so unsure about his future, unsure what and  _who_ it’ll hold, but if there’s one thing he knows, it’s that he’s going to spend every day falling deeper in love with Aaron.

He thinks he must fall in love with Aaron at least once a day, mostly when he’s doing nothing at all. When he’s so tired he starts mumbling incoherent words, or when he’s studying, with his tongue poking out and a crease in his brow, or right now; when he’s looking at Robert with so much love and warmth it could melt him.

The soft glow radiating from the fairy lights is highlighting Aaron’s face; his cheeks are flushed from the cool night air, and God … he’s beautiful, isn’t he? And Robert tells Aaron so while they’re stealing kisses under the lights of a thousand stars - Robert’s duvet cocooning the two of them.

Robert used to own worries and a chest full of heartache, now he feels nothing but gentle love and belonging. He sees journeys on Aaron’s palms, an adventure waiting in his smile and the future burning in his eyes.

They both know they’ll to crash back to reality with hundreds of missed calls and just as many questions to answer, but they’ll face that problem when they get to it.

_Instead, they stay up late enough to watch the sunrise replace the moon._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm @dingletragedy on tumblr xo


	3. being as in love with you as i am

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's robert's birthday and liv has a special gift for him, but she has to go behind aaron's back to sort it.

If you asked Aaron if he was a sentimental man he’d tell you no. No question about it. But Liv knows better, Liv knows about the secret playlist on his phone. He thinks he’s being subtle about it, but the RJS paired with a blue heart emoji kind of gives the game away.

It’s more than just a playlist full of soppy love songs. It’s a release, a comfort, a happy place. It’s funny really, Liv knows exactly when he needs it, even if Aaron wouldn’t ever admit it. Aaron has bad days, of course he does, no amount of counseling and love can erase the pain he’s been through. The days are few and far between now, but occasionally his insecurities rear their ugly head.

It was one of those days last Thursday, Liv knows the signs like the back of her hand now.

She’d attempted to greet Aaron with their usual morning handshake but he’d kept his head sunk low, hollow eyes staring into his cold tea. She’d shared a look with Robert over the kitchen, a pained look that speaks so much volume.  _He’s having a bad day and it hurts me because I love him but it’s hurting him impossibly more._

She knew Robert had an important meeting that morning, not because he’d said so, but because he was dressed up to the nines and folders of salient looking papers covered the coffee table. As it happens, she knows Robert just as well as she knows her brother, so she knew what he was about to do.

 _“Robert, I’ve got this”_ she’d told him, voice barely a whisper but he’d understood.

_“No, I can cancel, it’s no bother really”_

_“Just go Rob, go get this deal so can take me that holiday of a lifetime you promised” She_  knows exactly how to get her own way with Robert, he’s way too predictable.

She’d got him out of the door eventually, only after he’d lingered around Aaron for another twenty minutes. It’s sweet really, he just wants to take care of his husband. He thrives off it, being able to take care of Aaron, making him  _happy -_ she thinks it has something to do with all the times he  _couldn’t_  do that for him. 

Aaron had driven her to school, Greg James’ way-too-enthusiastic-for-eight-am voice filled the car. Now Liv hasn’t got anything against Greg James, she really hasn’t, but he’s not going to be the one to make Aaron feel better. She’d stubbly switched the mode on the radio, and gone straight in for Aaron’s RJS playlist. The slow, monolithic riff of Arctic Monkeys ‘Do I Wanna Know’ had charged the air, and it took all of 13 seconds before Aaron subconsciously tapped his fingers against the steering wheel. One minute forty-seven in and Aaron had found his voice, his impression of Alex Turners  _maybe I’m too busy being yours to fall for new_  line falling freely from his lips.

(Liv doesn’t know much about Roberts and his affair, she figured it best not ask. But she imagines it to be very fitting to this song.)

Music is Aarons release. _Music and Robert._

Which is why she’s currently holding a neatly wrapped CD, throat dry and heart hammering away. It’s Roberts birthday and Liv wanted to do something nice, something  _meaningful_ sohe’s burnt Aarons playlist onto a CD. She isn’t sure how he’s going to react, she thinks it’s pretty naff as far as birthday presents go. But Liv has bigger problems than that - Aaron’s most likely going to murder her.

 _“Oh a CD, is it Taylor Swift?”_ Robert asks with a crease in his brow. 

_“No, idiot. It’s not just any CD, it’s a CD of your life, yours and - and Aaron’s life together” She tumbled out._

_“There are 30 songs on there. I think. Each song relates to a period of your lives together. I can’t take all the credit, not when this soppy one here has a whole playlist dedicated the love of his life”_  Liv mocks.  _“But well - I yeah - I added a few of my own too.”_

If looks could kill she’d be the next victim to Aaron’s hostile glare, but Robert… well he’s tearing up, isn’t he? Soft lad.

Robert walks over to the CD player - thank god he’s a Grandad and still owns one of these ancient things, Liv thinks - and within seconds the familiar melody of The Love We Stole steals the attention of everyone in the room. Even little Seb’s eyes have glazed over, still, that could have something to do with the fact he’s been left there to feed himself.

Robert lets the sounds of  _love_ and  _home_  and _family_  continue to roll throughout the day. It’s nearing ten o’clock when Liv catches them having a dance in the kitchen. Aaron would deny it - just like he’d deny having a playlist made up of songs that remind him of his husband.

But she’s proven him wrong on two accounts today because here they are; Robert’s hands bunched up at Aaron’s waist and Aaron’s own wound around Robert’s neck. The whispered poetics of ‘Angels’ seeping deep into their hearts and leaving goosebumps to travel the expanse of Liv’s body. She carefully treads back to her room as to not disturb them.

But not before capturing the moment on her phone, of course.

_And every day_

_I am learning about you_

_The things that no one else sees_

_Being as in love with you as I am_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm @dingletragedy on tumblr. all comments and kudos are much appreciated!


	4. heart meets home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's the five year anniversary of their first kiss and aaron can't let the day pass without showing robert just how much it means to him.

Aarons trying to be romantic, trying being the operative word. It's taken three attempts, but he’s finally mastered it.

The baths run, there’s a bottle of  _expensive_  champagne on the side ( _because who uses glasses these days anyway?_ ) and the sounds of Tom Odells effusive piano playing is pouring over Robert’s fancy new speakers.

It’s been five years since Robert ruined his plans for a day off and lured him to a once unfamiliar lay-by. Capturing his heart and his  _whole fucking life_  too.

It seems like a lifetime ago, like he’s been watching a documentary on someone else’s journey.

Because this wasn’t meant for Aaron was it? He was built to devour pain and heartache, he set himself up for a life devoid of love and care and happiness. But now,  _now_  he gets to feel that every single day and he’s so fuckinglucky.

And that’s how Aaron’s found himself in this dreamy situation. He’s up to his neck in bubbles, the smell of candles burning is overbearing and he’s not quite sure how much more fancy champagne he can neck.

He’s a hopeless romantic in every sense of the word.  

Aaron won’t complain though. There is nothing more comforting in life than losing yourself in a porcelain tub overflowing with lavender and vanilla infused bubbles. Well, maybe there’s one thing, but he’s lucky enough to have that here too. 

The feel of Robert’s hands on him soothes him into a state of calmness he rarely achieves outside the comfort of his husband's arms. And Robert, well, he’s mumbling some nonsense about wanting to map every inch of Aaron’s skin with his tongue, but Aaron’s already been found -  _he’s Roberts_  - so now he’ll never explore.

Sure, he’d been in love before, they both had. But it had never felt like  _this_ , like the feeling was going to consume his entire being, his whole body flourishing with the force of the love he felt for the man tangled behind him.

_“I love you so much”_  Aaron’s statement pierces the easy stillness that descended over the bathroom. He tips his head back to rest on Robert’s shoulder, expanse of his neck on display.

Lips meet neck. 

Hands meet thighs.

Heart meets home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm @dingletragedy on tumblr if you want to come say hi


	5. satisfied bellies, worn out children and slightly buzzed heads

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the sugden-dingle family have some alone time after a busy summers evening.

It was Robert's favourite time of the day; the sun was setting and leaving a hazy glow in the sky, the smell of barbecues and family and _love_ lingering in the atmosphere, the air still warm enough to lounge around in the backyard with nothing but a t-shirt and shorts on.

They’d had a family party; Dingles, Sugdens and all the waifs and strays.

It’d only started to quieten down a mere half an hour ago, family and friends leaving with satisfied bellies, worn out children and slightly buzzed heads from the cocktail concoction Robert had knocked up.

Now just the four of them were sprawled out on a blanket under the fading sun.

Soft snores were coming from Seb‘s open mouth, Liv was laying on her back, angling her camera up to the sky, Aaron’s head was in Robert's lap and Robert… well he was in awe wasn’t he?

On this day two years ago he’d walked out of his home with a ring clutched tightly in his hand and a broken heart, unsure if he’d ever be welcomed back.

Now he’s got his own family, a whole crazy bunch of them. He’s got a son who he adores, a step-sister, whom he’d go to the ends of the earth for, a husband who he loves with every piece of him, and a baby on the way who he’s going to do his absolutely everything for.

Sometimes life really is beautiful.

And with that thought, Robert leans down to press a gentle kiss to his husbands flushed cheek.


	6. stop the world i wanna get off with you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> stangers met at an arctic monkeys gig au

If there’s one thing you should know about Aaron Dingle it’s that he really fucking loves Arctic Monkeys, alright? And he’s not about to miss their first Leeds gig because none of his arsehole mates have a clue what good music sounds like.

Aaron thinks the world has needed a band just like Arctic Monkeys for a while now, and they’ve more than managed to fill the gap left behind by the like of the imploding Libertines.

It’s 2007 and the unique sounds of  _Whatever People Say I am, I’m not have_ been pouring from every radio station for the past year now, the British are seemingly drawn towards gnarly lyrics and thick Yorkshire accents.

He even catches Cain singing along in the garage from time to time.

Some would say Aaron is a little bit obsessed with Arctic Monkeys  _(and even a little more obsessed with Alex Turner)._

So that’s how he’s found himself here - in the cramped o2 academy, only a few rows from the front. There are bodies pushing against him, he’s paid six quid for a pint and he can’t see for the fucking giant in front of him.

But he’s positive it’s going to be the best night of his life.

He just wasn’t expecting this blond fucking giant in front of him to contribute to the best night ever.

 

—

 

Robert’s not sure why he’s here really, he’s never been much of a music fan, but well he’s from  Sheffield, isn’t he?

It’s obligatory to love Arctic Monkeys.

Hailing from industrial Sheffield’s suburban depths just like Robert himself - he feels a connection to them - the lyrics give him a sense of home and comfort - which he’s been missing since he moved to Leeds in the attempt to gain a degree.

Now he’s here he’s glad he dragged himself out of the hell hole he calls a bedroom, staring at the same four walls gets tiresome.

And now, well, he feels alive again. Blood pumping and roaring in anticipation.

 

—

 

The band was only halfway through the third song, the crowd throwing themselves about to the sounds of Mardy Bum, bodies thrashing into each other and beer soaking his t-shirt and Aaron was well and truly pissed off. H

He hasn’t managed to escape the fucking giant in front of him yet, and to make matters worse he’s now throwing his long limbs around as if he’s the only person in this damn venue.  

Aaron sighs loudly, just by the ear of the giant, which got him his desired effect because the lad turns around to face Aaron.

And wow, to say Aaron is pleasantly surprised would be an understatement.

But no, he’s pissed off remember? He can find someone else to chat up - someone who’s not ruining his night.

“Oh sorry mate, I am blocking your view?” The stranger says, and Aaron would be sure he was being sarcastic if he didn’t look so genuine.

“Nah mate, not at all - I just can’t see a fucking thing” Aaron replies, patience snapped.

Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer.  

The lad has the decency to look affronted before his face changes into that of someone who’s just had a terrible idea.

“I’ll put you on my shoulders,” The man shouts over the music.

“You what?”

“So you can see.” The man says as if it’s that obvious.

“You’re mad mate”. Aaron shouts with a shake of his head. Knows he’s only seconds away from giving into the awful idea.

“Come on, it’ll be fun.”

And  _fuck it_ Aaron thinks.

Before he has time to process it, he’s sat on a stranger's shoulders, and God, if his mates could see him now he’d never hear the end of it, would he?

But well, Aaron’s looking at it from one perspective; he can finally see Alex Turner can’t he?

And he can’t deny that he’s quite enjoying the feel of the stranger’s hands on his thighs, the warm pressure sending tingles down his spine.

 

—

 

It’s not until halfway through the gig that Aaron learns the name of the gigantic idiot, or better known as, Robert. Aaron’s sure it’s a name he won’t be forgetting anytime soon.

He spends the rest of the gig stood in front of Robert, and if there’s a bit of waist grabbing and finger brushing occurring then that’s no one’s business.

_And if Aaron wasn’t so bloody obsessed with the band playing, he’d of dragged Robert to the toilets by now._

The crowd was still packed tight, which forced everyone to come together in a slow, sweaty grind of bodies, his back inching closer to Robert’s chest with every song.

They’re both sweaty messes and they gripping onto each other to void being separated by the waves of the mosh pits, but Aaron can’t think of anywhere else he’d rather be than nestled in the curve of Robert’s body right now.

With the exception of Robert, Aaron dislikes everyone in the room.

—

The gig comes to a close with Aaron still pressed impossibly close to Robert. Robert had his chin resting on Aaron’s shoulder and the whole thing feels horribly domestic but thrilling all at once.

As they get outside Aaron drinks Robert’s appearance in, he knew he was attractive, sure, but the dim lights in the club hadn’t done him justice at all.

The first thing Aaron notices about him are his lips - thick and tinted the prettiest shade of pink he’s ever seen, kissable in a way he never knew lips could look.

His smile’s gorgeous, and the dusting of freckles on his nose and cheeks becoming darker under the street lights.

His eyes are hazel and spotted with flecks of gold and green and Aaron thinks he could get lost in them. Wants to get lost in them.

He can feel his own mouth go dry as he looks over broad shoulders and big hands, one of which is resting on his own shoulder.

Robert gives him a light shove to his shoulder, snapping him out of his stance.

“So..” Robert let’s hang awkwardly in the air, and Aaron doesn’t know what say for the best. He doesn’t want this, _whatever this is_ , to end yet, but he can’t ignore the fact that the last bus is coming by in ten minutes.

“Look um -” Robert starts up again, “Do you have a ride home? Or I mean - we could - look - do you wanna go grab a bite to eat or something? I could murder a Maccies right about now.” Robert finally stammers out.

Robert prides himself on his confidence but Aaron’s unraveling him.

And Aaron hates himself right now, he has this opportunity to spend time with this amazingly beautiful man but he’s going to have to walk away from it.

Just like he has to walk away from everything good in his life.

Except he doesn’t this time because Robert drove here. He’s ditched his mates in favour of driving Aaron home.

“You’re not going to murder me are you?” Aaron says, his Mum’s voice nagging in his head.

“No, I can promise you I’m not capable of that, but I am going to take you out for a drink.” Robert states with a raise of his eyebrow and a quirk of his lips.

The cocky shit.

—

So maybe they do go to Macdonalds and sit occupying a table in the back, sharing a strawberry milkshake and exchanging sugar sweet kisses, until 2 am.

And maybe Aaron has just given Robert the blow job of his life in the back seat of Robert’s Corsa.

_And maybe Aaron will get to see his favourite band with his new boyfriend next year._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm dingletragedy on tumblr if you wanna chat!! X


	7. for the love of spamela

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which robert joins the dingles pig recuse mission and gets himself bloody arrested.

Robert was having, what he classes as, a really productive week. **  
**

That was until he found himself in a prison cell of all places.

You could say it was a slight inconvenience.

An inconvenience because he’d done nothing wrong

Well, not in the grand scheme of things - he was the lesser of all criminals in this situation, but he was the only one spending the after in a prison cell because the Dingles know how to avoid prison, don’t they?

And Robert, well he was only half Dingle.

 

—

 

It had all started when Belle returned home in the early hours of the morning after a night out with some old school friends, claiming that she was almost instantly alarmed by the lack of a certain pig milling around the place.

Which is how Robert had found himself up at Wishing Well for a family crisis meeting at the crack of dawn.

He’d thought about sacking it off, fobbing them off with an excuse about meeting a client, but then it struck him that he’s just blown his own business to pieces, and figured someone, most likely Cain, would catch him out and chop his bollocks off.

That, and Aaron was out of the village, at a scrap convention in Shipley. He’d made Robert promise to call with any news and keep an eye on everyone. The Dingles hadn’t been having much luck as of late, so he could understand Aaron’s concerns.

Plus, he’d never admit it aloud, but Robert loves having this big family - loves being needed and dependent on. It makes him feel part of something, that he’s valued and respected in - never overlooked or tossed aside like he has been with his own family many times previously.

 

—

 

He’d gone to the meeting, resisted the urge to roll his eyes once he’d heard that all the fuss was about a bloody pig. He’d met Charity’s eye from across the room and seen his own feelings reflecting back at him.

That’s the thing with him and Charity - they both lack sympathy for those who aren’t themselves or their respective partners. Some may call them selfish, but Robert knows better.

Robert thinks he’s the most selfless person he knows - considering he spent two hours trekking around the outskirts of Emmerdale whistling for a bloody pig, not just any pig no - a pig named Spamela Hamderson.

He’s just glad Aaron can’t see him right now, or god forbid Liv - they’d rip him to sheds.

After what seems like a lifetime, Cain posts an update in the family WhatsApp chat.

Robert fumbles with his phone to see the message, fingers cold from the bitter February air.

The message he reads makes him chuckle to himself, not quite believing the situation he’s in.

_We think we’ve found her. In some thieving bastards pen. Now we just need to steal her back before the farmers get wind. Girls go recoup at home - this is a mans job._

It’s a mans job, whatever that means. 

He’s pretty sure Charity is more experienced in this sort of criminal activity than all 4 men put together. 

But well, Roberts a man, isn’t he? So he supposes he better get a shift on - the address Cain sends though is, thankfully, just up the top of the road.

 

—

 

Nothing about the farm screams criminal activity - and he voices that opinion to the men, which he soon learns is a terrible mistake.

_Maybe Cain will chop his balls off after all._

Of course, they have this whole plan laid out. Sammy calls it the ‘how to steal your own pig guide’ and honestly, Robert can’t comprehend how Sammy has made it to the ripe age of 41 in, mostly, one piece.

It’s all going smoothly until they hear sirens.

Because  _of-fucking-_ _course_  this pig is in fact  _not_  Spamela.

And sure, Robert’s covered up a murder before, but he’s at a loss of what to do in this situation.

Luckily for him, Sammy takes the lead.

Only he puts Robert right at the forefront of everything, doesn’t he?

Oh yeah, apparently this was all Robert’s idea.

And the fact he’s holding an obvious pair of fence cutters doesn’t exactly do him any favours.

It’s safe to say Roberts the only one who ends up in the back of a police car - apparently, he’s the brains of the family - which Sammy seems to think is a solid ground of reason to throw Robert under a fucking double-decker bus.

 

—

 

It must be nearing eight o’clock by now; the small window in his cell has been streaming nothing but a dark glow for hours now.

And Robert knows Aaron’s here, knows because he’s been told by DS Wise, and knows because he’s heard him gobbing off.

Knowing the Dingles are going to be on the receiving end of an angry Aaron right now, is more than a comfort to him.

 

_They deserve it._

 

Because Roberts too old for his. He has too many responsibilities, he has children for God’s sake.

But more importantly, he’d planned a special night in for Aarons return. Just the two of them, a bottle of expensive red and an empty house to make the most of.

The whole lot of them should count themselves lucky that he’s just been released without further questioning.

 

—

 

When he arrives home Aaron is stood in the kitchen. He’s leaning over the sink, his back to Robert and his chest is heaving rapidly.

He’s talking on the phone, well no, he’s shouting. Roberts not sure who he’s spitting his harsh words at but rather them than him, he thinks to himself.

As soon as he hears Robert shuffling towards him he haphazardly throws his phone on the counter and visually sighs with relief.

He’s on Robert in seconds, stretching up on his toes to wrap his arms around his neck.

“Robert, I’m so sorry” He’s saying, over and over again. Robert reckons he’s got nothing to be sorry for, and he tells him as much.

“I know but - God Robert, you could’ve been arrested - charged - and that’s not fair Rob, it’s not. I couldn’t cope if you were inside”. Aarons saying, eyes shining with unshed tears.

And that’s the thing, isn’t it? This runs so much deeper for Aaron. Even the slightest mention of prison has Aaron’s back up, mind flooding with painful memories and fear.

Robert could kill Sammy and Cain right now. If Aaron hasn’t already, that is.

“Hey, listen to me,” Robert says softly, “I’m going nowhere, I’d never leave you, Aaron.” He places his hand on Aaron’s face and wipes away the stray tear that he couldn’t contain any longer.

Aaron huffs out a laugh, void of any amusement, “What and you’re sure you don’t want to divorce me?” Aaron asks, sounds too genuine for Roberts liking.

“Of course not, you idiot,” Robert reassures him. “I might have to divorce your family though.” He says, attempting to lighten the mood.

Only Aaron casts his head down towards the floor, a tear splashing from his face, thudding on the floor and on Robert’s heart too. And Robert, well he hates everyone who turned Aaron into this insecure mess.

“I fell in love with you, not them, okay? And this, nor anything else, will ever change that, Mr. Sugden-Dingle.”

And that gets him a slight smile, shy and apprehensive, but a smile none the less. He takes the opportunity to solidify his love for Aaron with a tender kiss.

So Robert doesn’t get the night in he had planned, but he does fall asleep with his head on Aaron’s lap and fingers scratching lightly at his head - he reckons that might top anything else.

 

_God being a Dingle is exhausting._

 

_But he wouldn’t change it for the world._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm dingletragdey on tumblr, come talk to me! kudos & comments appreciated if you didn't find my attempt at humour too terrible.


	8. i crumble completely when you cry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warnings for brief mentions of self-harm and gordon. take care of yourselves.

April had always been a tough tough month for Aaron, Robert is more than aware of that.

It’s in the way he sleeps during the day, an effect of the nightmares which are plaguing him in the still of the night.

It’s in the way he shuts down, eyes distant and mind occupied. 

But it’s mostly in the way he snaps at the people he loves the most. 

Like now.

 

—

 

_Robert had persuaded Aaron to indulge him with a date night at the pub, the promise of a Madras and a pint enough for Aaron to give in eventually._

_The plan was to distract Aaron, attempt to get that beautiful smile back on his husbands face, even if only for a few hours._

_But well, that had all gone tits up within a mere few minutes._

_They’d walked into the pub and almost instantly Chas’ eyes were all over them. Robert understands her concerns, of course he does, he just wishes she’d be a little more stubble._

_“Alright love?” Chas asked Aaron, voice laced with the same concern her eyes were reflecting._

_“Yeah fine,” Aaron deadpanned - he’s irritable at the best of times._

_“It’s just - well - with is being the day it is I-”_

_“Two pints please Mum” Aaron interrupts her._

_Aaron would rather do anything than talk about it. **Talk about him.**_

_So he takes it upon himself to find a table, leaving Robert to wait for the drinks._

_Chas turns her attention back to Robert as soon as Aaron is out of earshot, “Is he alright?” She asks in a hushed voice._

_“Not really, no. But he will be. I’ll make sure of it.” Robert says as Chas passes him over two pints, tries his best at offering her a reassuring smile._

_“And he’s not you know - he’s not hurt himself, has he?” Chad is questioning making Robert wince slightly at the mere thought._

_“No, no he’s not. He hasn’t” Robert says truthfully._

_He knows Aaron hasn’t, knows because he’s familiar with the trace of Aaron. Familiar with every rough edge and each line of jagged skin._

_He’s been spending countless minutes a night tracing Aaron’s skin with his delicate fingertips, distracting him with gentle kisses to the back of his neck._

_He figures Aaron has probably figured him out by now by, but he hasn’t said anything if that’s the case. He knows Robert needs it just as much as himself._

_But Chas won’t let it drop, will she?_

_“Are you sure, I mean - how can you be so sure?”_

_“I know it might come as a surprise to you Chas but I do see him naked you know?” Robert had snapped, patience wearing thin._

_Only that’s the point Aaron decides to come and see what’s taking Robert so long._

_Robert cowers away from him because he knows Aaron heard the tail end of the conversation. Knows he isn’t happy about if the angry vein protruding on this neck is anything to go by._

_“What’s all this?” He asks sharply._

_“Oh nothing for you to worry about love, I was just asking Roberts opinion on our new-”_

_“- Cut the bullshit Mum,” Aaron berated._

_“Aaron,” Robert warns._

_“Don’t Aaron me, do you have any idea how embarrassing it is to have your husband and Mum talking about you like that, in the middle of the fucking pub?”_

_What followed was a lengthy silence, shattered by a sad huff escaping Aaron’s mouth._

_“I’m going out,” He proclaimed, stalking towards the doors, making it clear it wasn’t up for discussion, “Don’t follow me.”_

_And suddenly Robert wasn’t up in the mood for a pint._

 

—-

 

Which is how he’d found himself here. Sat on the sofa of his home at one am, Liv and Seb packed off to the pub - he knew what was to follow wouldn’t be pretty. They didn’t need it and neither did Aaron.

Robert’s got his head in his hands and phone on his lap - willing Aaron to call him. Or text him. Or  _anything_. He just needs to know he’s okay, it’s tearing him up inside, the worry gnawing away at his stomach.

It’s been five hours since Aaron had stormed out of the pub, and he hasn’t heard a word since.

Sure, he wanted to follow Aaron, going as far as walking out of the doors on one instance, but he knew Aaron. He knew that going against his wishes was going to do more damage than good.

He just needed time to cool off Robert had told himself.

Not five hours though, surely?

He was about to call Aaron for the umpteenth time, plans of leaving him a voicemail full of pleads and sorrow were cut short when he heard a key fumbling in the lock.

Robert was on his feet in seconds, at the door by the time Aaron had managed to let himself in.

He stumbles through the door and it’s on reflex that Robert goes to steady him, one hand resting on his arm and the other at his waist.

Relief seeps through Robert when Aaron allows him to help, it’s cut short though when Aaron roughly tugs his own arm out of Robert’s grip and shakes him off.

“Don’t,” Aaron huffs through gritted teeth.

“I’ve been so worried Aaron, where have you been?”

“None of your business,” Aaron retorts as he slumps himself down on the sofa with a tired sigh.

“You’ve been drinking tonight, haven’t you?” Robert question, although the answer is more than obvious.

“Well done Einstein.” Aaron spans, voice devoid of emotion.  

“I know you’ve been struggling Aaron, I know how difficult this is for you.”

“Oh really?” Aaron says, voice dripping with sarcasm, “You see I don’t think you have a clue Robert, not you or anyone else for that matter.”

And he has a point, doesn’t he? How can anyone ever really understand the pain seeping through Aaron’s body? No one should ever have to /understand/ it. No one should ever have to _feel_  it.

Aaron’s gulping down a glass of water he’d poured himself, hands shaking with a force that scares him. Robert hopes the water helps clear his head, hope it settles something inside him.

Only he’s placing the glass on the counter with fimble fingers and he’s not quick enough to stop it slipping, the glass smashing into a million pieces on the hard floor.

_And Robert’s fucking heart too._

It’s just that Aaron doesn’t seem fazed by it, and that alarms Robert more. He turns his back and slumps himself down on the sofa with a tired sigh.

Leaves Robert to clear up the mess of a broken heart.

“I don’t want to fight with you Aaron,” He says once he’s got the majority of the glass swept up.

Makes a mental note to take the rubbish out first thing in the morning.

Better to be safe than sorry, he thinks.

“Well piss off then,” And Robert can’t take it to heart, not when Aaron’s voice wavers and his eyes are pricking this tears.

He walks over to the sofa and perches himself down next to Aaron, mindful to leave an inch or two of space between them, aware of Aarons needs for personal space at times.

“I’m sorry. About earlier,” Robert starts, “You’ve got nothing to be embarrassed about Aaron - nothing to be ashamed of - you’ve just - you’ve got all these people who care about you so much, who love you, who hate seeing you hurting - most of all me. I just wish I could do something to take your pain away.”

“Yeah, well you can’t,” Aaron says, sounds deflated. But Robert hears a flicker of something in his words, it sounds much like a cry for help.

“I can’t if you don’t talk to me Aaron, no. But I want you to talk to me; wherever, however.”

“I don’t - you don’t need this Robert, you’ve got enough going on. I’m better off dealing with this stuff on my own.”

“But you’re not on your own Aaron - you know that. When you’re hurting, I’m hurting too. When you’ve got a problem, I’ve got a problem too. Do you understand?” Robert questions softly.

Aaron nods and sniffs, the tears that had been threatening to fall finally making their downpour on Aaron’s face.

And it’s all Robert can do to pull him into his chest.

Aaron picks at a thread on Robert’s joggers, “I’m sorry about earlier too, and for snapping at you. Again.” he whispers.

“It’s forgotten, don’t worry about it,” Robert reassures, shifting his position in an attempt to rise them both from the sofa.

“Can we just - can we stay here for a bit?” He pleads, and who’s Robert to deny his husband?

“Yeah - yeah course. As long as you promise we’ll talk tomorrow?”

And Robert gets a half nod out of his husband before he’s finding his home in the crook of Robert’s neck - soft snores filling the quiet room.

 

It’s the best night sleep Aaron’s had in weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, thanks for reading! X


	9. i'll be your biggest fan and you'll be mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "i can't believe you just did that!" + teen!robron playing truth or dare

Victoria knew that Robert had a crush on Aaron before Robert knew that he had a crush on Aaron. Which explains why she’d invited him along to the party Robert had decided throw while their parents were away. Sure, Vic and Aaron had always been friends, the pair of them just a year below Robert at sixth form, but Vic could’ve invited anyone - _anyone but Aaron._

It’s not that Robert doesn’t want to see Aaron, God he does, it’s just that Robert knows what he’s like when he has a drink - knows it will only take a few beers before he’s up on the rooftop, telling the whole village all the explicit things he’s dreamed of doing to Aaron.

And well, Aaron looks beautiful tonight, effortlessly so. His grey jumper clings to him just right, and Robert wonders what Aaron’s muscles feel like under the fabric. But it wasn’t the jumper that was the main problem, no, it was the ridiculously tight jeans has was adorning, Robert had to use all his self-control just to pull his eyes away from the curve of his arse.

Like he knows Robert is thinking about him, Aaron shifts, makes his way over to the temporary bar, out of Robert’s view. 

“We could play truth or dare!” One of Robert’s mates pipes up, stuffing a handful of crisps into his mouth - obviously no one had taught him table manners when he was younger.

There’s a cheer around the room, and Robert feels like he’s hanging around with a bunch of 13-year-olds, because surely they’re too old for games like this now?

“Oh come on Robert, don’t be such a bore,” he hears a familiar voice bellow over to him from the bar, a gruff voice he’s memorised.

It’s safe to say Robert so much as runs to join the circle of bodies in his living room.  

The first round of questions are tame as they pass around the bottle, no ones had enough to drink to be choosing dares just yet.

As the level of the vodka in the bottle being passed around dropped, the volume in the room increasing by the second, laughter and chatter now drowning out the thumping beat of the music. And when Robert dares to glance over at Aaron, he can see the tightness of his smile has loosened as he’s actively chatting away with Vic.

Robert is snapped out of his thoughts when someone to his left starts slurring about getting down and gritty, apparently everyone needs to top up their drinks before they _really get into it._

When they’re all seated back in the makeshift circle, Victoria gives Robert this wicked look, raises her eyebrows and grins in his direction. Robert knows she’s up to something. Doesn’t dare to guess what.

“Right! Let’s start with the host shall we?” Victoria asks, but doesn’t give anyone the chance to protest before she continues, “Rob, truth or dare?”

“Truth.” He says confidently. 

There’s a collective protest from his friends, but Robert won’t let them pressure him. “What? I’m not letting any of you idiots dare me into doing something stupid.” 

They can call him boring all they like, Robert’s not about to make a twat f himself in front of Aaron. It’s safer this way.

 

Or so he thinks. 

 

“If you had to choose one person of the same sex in this room, to sleep with, tonight, who would it be?” Victoria asks, with a glint in her eyes.

The room is completely silent. You could hear a pin drop. Someone in the kitchen slams the fridge door shut and Robert jumps. It seems that everyone is anticipating just who the newly-out lad could be crushing on - his friends are probably worried he’s going to say one of them. In their dreams, Robert thinks.

When Robert dares to glance up he spots Aaron looking at him curiously, there’re small red spots of colour high on his cheekbones and Robert’s stomach feels like it’s jumping around inside of him. He can feel the heat creeping up his own neck, confident that he resembles a tomato right now.

The cup in his hand crinkles from how hard he grips it, blush blooming on his cheeks. 

He shrugs, makes some vague hand gestures and shakes his head a lot, hopes it looks like it’s a difficult decision to make, wants to throw everyone off the idea that he’s been thinking about one lad for months, years, now. He clears his throat and wills himself to sound casual, “uh - I don’t know - uh - probably Aaron.”

Robert doesn’t regret it like he thought he might, in fact he feels on top of the world suddenly, he tries not to smile at the surprised look in Aaron’s eyes.

The feeling doesn’t last long though, because only seconds later, Aaron is rushing out of the door - the stomp of his feet on the stairs deafening - even over the beat of the music - leaving a hostile atmosphere to descend over the previously buzzing room.

 

–

 

Robert finds Aaron is his bedroom, and he’s got to admit it wasn’t the first place he thought to look, in fact, it was the last. He’s pictured Aaron in this bedroom; splayed out on the bed, shoved up against the wall, curled up under the covers. But he never thought he’d be lucky enough for it to become a reality.   

“Hi,” Robert whispers, almost inaudible through the music that’s still playing downstairs, the walls vibrating with it.

“Hi,” Aaron replies.

“Didn’t expect to find you up here,” and when Aaron doesn’t as much as raise his head Robert tries again, “is everything okay? Only I don’t think you could’ve escaped that room any quicker.”

“I can’t believe you just did that! This is all just some big joke to you lot isn’t it?” Aaron says with so much heat that Robert has to take a step back.

“What are you on about?”

“With me being the only gay lad here, you think you can just embarrass me like that? What is it Robert? Are you that desperate to get your dick wet that you’d use me for the night?” And if Robert wasn’t confused before, he definitely is now. He goes to speak, desperate to deny all accusation, but Aaron cuts him off again, “you know there’s a whole world out there Robert, there’s so much more beyond Emmerdale - go out there and find someone you really want - and leave me the hell out of it.”

“What if I don’t want to explore Aaron? What if everything I need _is_ right here in Emmerdale? Have you stopped for even a second to think that maybe, just maybe, all of that, down there, was genuine?”

Aaron looks bewildered, as if he can’t possibly comprehend why Robert would want _him._

“I want you, Aaron. I always have.”

“Always?”

“Alright, well not always. But since that day Vic brought you home from school with her, and I gave you an earful about treating her right.”

“God that was so embarrassing,” Aaron laughs, both of them caught up in the memory of two closeted boys making idiots of themselves.

Robert walks towards Aaron, who’s perched on the bed, he’s careful not to make any fast movements or rash decisions.

But well Aaron’s laughing again, isn’t he? His walls are down and Robert doesn’t want to waste the opportunity. He reaches for Aaron’s hand, he can’t stop the shaking, a reminder that is heart is on the _fucking_ line here.

After what seems like a lifetime, Aaron slowly stretches his arms out, nimble fingers reach around Robert’s. Robert twists his hand in Aaron’s grip, palm up, and flexes finger to wrap around Aaron’s wrist.

“Hey,” Robert says, starting again. There’s something in his eyes, a question, but Aaron has no answers to give him. “Hey, look at me.”

Aaron smiles at him, but it’s laced with a sadness. “Don’t, Robert.”

“I meant what I said Aaron. I really like ya.”

Aaron attempts to pull his hand away, but Robert grips on tighter, afraid that Aaron will make a run for it if he let’s go.

“Look, if you don’t like me Aaron just say. I’m a big boy, I’m sure I can handle it.”

“That’s - I do - that’s not what it was about.”

“Then explain it to me, Aaron. What was it about?”

Aaron pauses before he speaks, and each second feels like a lifetime to Robert. “I’m not going to be another of your drunken mistakes.”

“Bold you of to assume I have any drunken mistakes.” “Of course you do, you’re Robert Sugden.” And Robert doesn’t reply this time - instead, he pulls. His fingers dig into the bones of Aaron’s wrist, pulling his arm up, and the rest of Aaron’s body follows; follows until they're chest to chest, face right above his.

Their hands are resting, joined, on Roberts’s ribs. Aaron locks eyes on them as Robert twists his wrist out of his grip, slow, gentle, and lets Aaron’s hand fall there.

“Aaron,” Robert whispers, a warning, a plea. He’s not certain what’s happening, but at the same time, he knows. It’s plain to see in the way his own fingers trace the hollow of Aaron’s collarbone, in the way Aaron tilts his head back to give Robert access.

“Robert,” and it’s Aaron’s turn to plead now - his voice high, stuck in his throat.

And then, then Aaron utters the words that make Robert’s heart explode.

“I dare you to kiss me.”

 

So Robert does.

 

He cups Aaron’s cheek, holding him in place with a touch that’s barely there. Aaron’s pulse is racing against his fingers, skin hot, and he’s nervous too, he’s got to be, because this feels monumental. There’s no time to think, and he doesn’t want to, not until they’ve both sobered up and Aaron tells him this was a mistake no doubt. He wants this so badly it makes him shake, so he pushes in to taste Aaron’s smile, to find home in his mouth.

Suddenly it feels as if the entire world is exploding and disappearing at the same time - the pulse of electricity that barrels through Robert nearly knocks him flat.

There’s only one other thing Robert needs to know now; what the inside of Aaron’s mouth tastes like after hours a relentless snogging.

And he wastes no time in finding out, swiping his tongue across Aaron’s chapped lips, entering with a certainty Robert hasn’t felt in a long time.

There’s this unfamiliar, pleasant pit of warmth deep in his stomach, a little like a volcano that erupts when Aaron’s close to him, sending a slow-burning, tickling flame through Robert’s veins. It’s not something he’s felt before, it came without warning, without permission, but Robert has never ached for something so much in his life.

Maybe that’s just what Aaron does to him – ignites a whole new personal universe right inside his chest, every beat of his heart a new explosion.

He’s knocked from his thoughts when Aaron tears his mouth from Robert’s, the warmth flooding from his body almost immediately. Aaron’s looking at him with this softness that Robert almost melts under, but there’s a flash of concern laced in Aaron’s intense stare.

Robert is trembling when he pulls away and goes back in for another kiss, barely taking in enough air because he has to have this, have Aaron, while he can.

But Aaron stops him again, apparently he’s big on the talk, surprisingly. “You sure about this?” Aaron says, breathless from the lack of air in his lungs.

Robert doesn’t answer, only smirks at the low moan the other boy lets out when he gasps at the extent of Aaron’s length, Robert’s hand having expertly found its way under Aaron’s skinny jeans.

“Oi,” Aaron says, pushing at Robert’s chest once again, “can you hear me?”

“What is it?” he says, and barely recognises his own voice. “You okay?”

Aaron just - looks. Time passes in the slow blinks of his lashes, one, two, three in absolute silence. He’s all tousled, blush running down his neck, making it’s way down his bare chest now Robert has managed to get rid of Aaron’s jumper. He’s an absolute miracle.

Aaron shakes his head a little, then opens his mouth like he’s going to say something, but he must change his mind at the last minute.

“Nothing,” he whispers eventually, licking his lips. “Just - are you sure?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m sure Aaron. I’ve never been so sure in my life, okay? I want you.”

He pours everything he’s got into the next kiss, getting Aaron’s mouth open just right, sucking on his bottom lip. He tastes sweet, sweet like the orange juice he’d mixed his vodka with earlier - absolutely intoxicating in every sense. Robert could drown in him right now; would be perfectly content not coming up for air ever again.

Suddenly things flip and Aaron takes control of the kiss and Robert feels this intense need to anchor himself before he floats off. He gets a hand in Aaron’s curls, finally in the way that he’s really wanted to, and tugs. Aaron listens immediately, stretches up on his toes so he can kiss Robert more thoroughly, can explore every corner of his beautiful mouth, can mouth at his jaw and suck a mark into his neck.

“So gorgeous,” slips out of his mouth without him noticing, too preoccupied with miles and miles of Aaron’s warm, strong neck. “Aaron, Jesus, you’re so - so beautiful.”

Aaron ducks his head under the attention before taking a shaky breath. “This feels right. Doesn’t it?” Aaron’s asking, somehow still managing to sound unsure of himself. _Of Robert._

Robert’s breath stutters. “It does,” he replies, before he can stop and think about it.

“It does,” he repeats. “It feels - it feels like it could be so much.”

“It feels,” he continues, and looks up at the ceiling this time, his face shiny with tears in the light. “It feels like I could love you, one day. Like you could love me.”

 

_I already do, Robert thinks, falling apart breath by breath. I already do._


	10. robron & compliments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a headcanon about robron & compliments for anon on tumblr xx

Robert loves compliments; giving them more than receiving them. You just have to ask his husband about that. And it’s that Aaron doesn’t want to compliment Robert, it’s not that he doesn’t thinks he’s bloody gorgeous; it’s just not him. Not unless it’s half one in the morning and Roberts got him feeling like he’s melting into the sheets.

He compliments Robert mostly with insults, it’s just how they work. Robert goes for the ridiculously soppy approach whilst Aaron aims for the  _failing_  hardman routine.

Well, that is until someone else thinks it’s alright to insult Robert. News flash: it’s not.

They’re at this fancy new bar in Leeds, Robert’s choice, obviously. Robert leaves his side for three whole seconds before this mardy looking bloke is sliding into the booth, taking his place beside Aaron. Aaron has no interest in idle conversation with a terrible flirt and the tells the lad that. He also wafts his wedding finger in his face whilst pointing Robert out from the crowd at the bar.

“What him?” The man asks, sounding disgusted and Aaron’s defences are  up straight away.

“Yeah him.” He says proudly before the man is asking why. As if it’s not obvious just from looking at Robert.  _God_.

And then Robert is hovering by the table, confused as to what he’s just walked in on. Aaron is saying things that sound like they’ve been plucked straight out an Adele song.

“You’ve got nothing on him mate, he’s dead fit. And not only that, he’s an amazing husband  _and_  the best Dad. He cooks all these fancy meals that would put Gordon Ramsey to shame.  _And_  he’s proper clever - the sexy kind,” Robert thinks he’s finished but he should know by now that when Aaron gets started on a speech, he doesn’t stop. “Why the hell would I wanna throw that away from some sloppy blow job? My husband, my best friend and my home - for some less than average sex? No thanks.”

Then the man is standing up faster than Robert can blink, making a run for the door. But it appears Aaron just can’t help himself and before Robert can stop him he’s shouting - “Oh, and he’s a bloody good shag too!” - across the bar.


	11. robron & sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a look into robert's thoughts of sex with his husbands for anon x

Robert loves sex. He always has, since he was a naive teenager; too young to understand the concept of making love.

But even as he got older, he’s not entirely sure he grasped the feeling. He thought he was making love, with Katie, with Chrissie. But then Aaron had come along, with his rough edges and sharp tongue and shown Robert exactly what it was to make love.

It’s all consuming and intoxicating and everything good in the world.

It’s Aaron whispering “ _you’re so fucking hot_ ,“ into Robert’s thigh whilst looking up at him with eyes of adoration and lust.

It’s in they way Aaron kisses him, softly yet with so much heat, making Robert feel more than he has ever felt anything in his life.

It’s in the way their bodies transcend their shapes, moulding together to make one. Until Robert can’t remember where he starts and Aaron stops.

It’s in the way Aaron cares for him after; offers him a warm flannel, checks he’s okay - wraps an arm around his chest, holds him tight.

It’s in the promises and the vows and the way the tangle their fingers together; wedding bands clashing in attempt to ground them

It’s in the declarations of love, the ones that pour from their mouths like a waterfall. Whispers of _I_   _love you_  filling the air and Robert’s eyes too.

 

_It’s in the way that it feels like the first time._

 

_Every time._


	12. robron & hospital

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> robert and aaron welcome their baby daughter into the world

Robert hates hospitals; the corridors are eerie quiet and stuffy all at once. An unavoidable sense of death creeping around the place, like flames licking up the walls and engulfing you. Only this time there is no sign of death in sight, only life. Brand new life.

Aaron’s legs are bouncing nervously by the side of him; but not with a nervousness of fear, just one of excitement - okay, and a little fear - but that’s only natural. Considering they’re only a matter of time away from meeting their baby girl.

After what seems like days of waiting, the nurses call them in and Robert feels every emotion he knew possible all in one crazy flurry. The following hour goes by in a whirlwind, Robert urges Aaron hold the baby first, partly because he wants to see the picture he’s been dreaming of for months come to life, partly because he’s terrified - terrified he’ll break her.

But the second she’s in his arms he doesn’t want to let go, not ever. Not now she’s so small and precious and finally here. Not when she’s four and going off to school, too cool for a daddy kisses. Not when she’s thirteen and thinks she rules the world. Not when she’s eighteen and thinks it’s acceptable to go to uni half-way across the country.

Aaron sneaks his arms around Robert then, snapping him out of his thoughts of the future. He wishes he could stay in this moment forever - their baby daughter safely in his arms and his husband’s arms wrapped tightly around his middle, one drawing circles on Robert’s hip and the other on their daughters hair. He can feel like odd splash of tear wet his shoulder in time with the ones wetting his own cheeks, he turn to kiss Aaron then. No words needed. Just the soft press of salty lips as their daughter slips out a sound of delight.


	13. where's the good in goobye?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> another prompt for robron x hospital (but sad)

When Aaron dies Robert doesn’t leave the hospital for days. It’s not entirely unexpected, they’re both in their nineties and time has been so precious lately, but it doesn’t make it any easier - only harder. And so he doesn’t leave, he refuses to. He can’t, _can’t_ leave his husband here on his own. He never would. He can’t leave the place he last held his hand, kissed his lips, said I love you. the last place he saw his _beautiful husband._

It’s not long before he ends up in a hospital bed himself, after collapsing from dehydration and exhaustion. He hasn’t been looking after himself, can’t muster up the strength to do so. Because Aaron always looked after him, didn’t he? The last few years Robert had been getting older and weaker each day; something Aaron took great pleasure in teasing him about - but it didn’t stop him bringing Robert a coffee to bed every morning, and helping him with his bath every night. Who was going to do that for him now? He couldn’t but that kind of responsibility on their kids. He was supposed to go first - that’s the way it was always meant to be.

He'd got his time with Aaron, got his 80-something promise - hell they even got to the 90 mark. But it wasn’t enough. _No amount of time with Aaron would ever be enough._ But now he was gone. Just like that. forever. His soulmate, his heart, his whole fucking life. There’s not many times in his life Robert has wished himself dead, none at all actually, but lying in that hospital bed - 72 hours after Aaron had died - well, there was only place he wanted to be.

_With Aaron._


	14. robron & scars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warnings for mentions of self-harm scars, look after yourself xx

Aaron has never been a fan of summer. He never liked the sticky hot weather, the too bright, too warm, too early, morning and he especially didn’t like the fact that everyone was assumed to be comfortable in wearing t-shirt’s or god forbid, no top at all. Not when he had so much he felt ashamed of, so much to hide.

But then Robert had come along. Not the Robert of the affair; of the lying and the cheating and the harsh tongue. But his Robert. The Robert who married him. Twice. The Robert who made him see that his scars were nothing to be afraid of, but rather something he could feel a sense of pride for.

Over the years he’d made Aaron see he didn’t have to hide away, that he should love his body the way Robert does, that he is beautiful - scars and all. Robert had kissed along them so many times, sealed them with love and care and everything in between.

2018 was the first summer he felt one hundred percent confident in himself, the weather was scorching; the hot sun burning the backs of their necks and settling in their veins. He’s felt confident around Robert for months, years, now but everyone else? Well, that was a different matter entirely. Until the past summer - until he was taking his top off at the annual dingle BBQ and not thinking twice about it. he hadn’t realised for an hour or two, not until Robert snuck up and wound his arm around him, his fingers brushing gently over Aaron's scars and whispered "I’m so proud of you, beautiful" in his ear.

Aaron loved summer now, with Robert, with his family. They both spend many nights sitting in grace’s beer garden - somewhere Aaron feels happy, at peace, and often beer drunk. They share stories of the past and hopes for the future, they share laughs with friends and kisses with each other. 

He doesn’t give his scars a single thought - if he wants to wear a t-shirt then he will. And as Robert so consistently says, if anyone has a problem, then that’s their issue, not Aaron's.


	15. robron & ed roberts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a drunk robert befriends aaron's ex-boyfriend on a night out

They’re out at some bar in town, it’s vibrant and loud and everything that Robert and Aaron are too old for now. But that doesn’t stop Robert from having a bloody good time. He’s been on the beer, the cocktails and even the bloody shots. So Aaron just leaves him too it - it’s best that way - and him and Ellis sneak off to a corner booth whilst Robert and the girls own the dance-floor.

It’s another hour before he sees his husband again, he’s at the bar with some bloke; some tall, lean, muscular bloke and won’t deny the way he’s stomach drips slightly; insecurities rearing their ugly heads, only briefly. As if Robert notices his husbands presence he turns to face Aaron and beckons him over to the bar with this smug smile on his face and mischievous look in his eyes. 

Everything is fine one minute and then the next Robert is introducing Aaron to his new best friend, Ed. Ed _Fucking_  Roberts. Aaron opens his mouth to say something but his body feels like it’s elsewhere, as if it can’t connect to his own mind. It’s ed who breaks the silence, a shocked _“Aaron?”_   leaving his mouth, loud enough to be heard over the banging music and thrum of his heart. Robert’s eyes flick between the two of them, confusion clear on his face, until his eyebrows all but shoot off his head and Aaron knows that’s the moment he clicks. 

_Aaron and Ed. Ed. Aaron's ex._

Aaron wants the ground to swallow him whole, it’s the only thing that could make this situation any better, considering his husband has just befriended his fucking ex-boyfriend. He’s expecting Robert to fly off the handle any minute, so it’s a shock when all he hears is laughter around him, real, eye-watering, belly-clutching laughter. Because his husband is a drunk idiot who apparently finds this whole situation hilarious.

Aaron is trying to give Robert the side-eye - get them both out of this place without causing any drama, but Robert seems to have other ideas. He’s turning to the bar and ordering three pints. Three. Robert places one of the drinks in a surprised Ed's hands, and when the ex turns to asks Robert why’s he’s brought him a drink, Robert’s explanation is a cool  _“well it’s a sorry - and a thank you - for being a complete dickhead and letting the best thing you could ever possibly have go.”_

And if Aaron didn’t want to die before he certainly does now. 

 _"So - here’s to Aaron, my beautiful husband.”_ And fuck, Aaron is going to divorce him in the morning. 


	16. robron & conner jensen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for the lovely terry on tumblr!

When Conner Jenson returns to the village he’s shocked to be met by the face of an unfamiliar woman at the doors of Home Farm. He makes some joke about Chrissie white ageing terribly and it doesn’t go down well at all. He gets the door slammed shut in his face and no answers on Robert Sugden’s whereabouts. 

Conner makes his way into the village and naturally to the pub, although there’s no signs of Robert there either. He asks the blonde woman behind the bar where he can find Robert and she tells him he’d just left the pub and made his way home, she adds that it’s probably best not to disturb them right now and he has no idea what the smug look on her face means. 

He gets Robert's address out of her eventually and makes his way down to the mill, he has to knock at least five times before he’s greeted by a shirtless and breathless Robert. He looks different; happier, more sure of himself and it only makes conner want him. Only it seems Robert doesn’t feel the same because he’s telling him to get lost before he’s even saying hello - but Conner is a tease, and persistent, and when he wants he gets. Well usually he does, but it’s not long before this bearded man is turning up at Robert's side - also shirtless and breathless. 

Robert panics then, he’s rambling on about a Conner being a pesky salesman but Conner won’t take that. He calls Robert a cheat and lair and someone that won’t ever change. And then conner is mentioning Chrissie, calling her a poor cow and asking if she knows about Robert's latest dirty little secret, and that’s enough to crack Robert. He shoves Conner hard, uses that sharpe tongue of his to put Conner in is his place and then tells him to leave him and his husband alone. 

The whole event is unexpected and unwelcome and it shocks Robert to the core. so much so that he spends the rest of the day in his own head, ignoring everyone, including Aaron. Aaron wants answers but he isn’t getting them from his husband so he tries the bottom of a pint glass instead. He’s moaning away to his Mum over the bar when Conner walks in and Aaron won’t let him get away without getting the truth out of him. Conners calling Aaron the luckiest bloke in the world and he’s practically drooling at the memories of Robert, trying to rile Aaron up but it won’t work - it’s not enough, not the answers he wanted but it’s something. It’s enough for Aaron to gather a small insight into their history, and instead of feeling jealousy, he only feels concern. 

It’s why he goes home to Robert then, makes sure his husband knows he can tell him anything. And he does, Robert tells him everything. Everything from those ten years away; the good, the bad and the ugly. Everything that he’s kept hidden, buried under later and layers, from everyone. He releases the memories with tears and his husband's arms wrapped tightly around him. 

It only makes Aaron love him more.


	17. robron & freckles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> aaron loves his husband's freckles, always has done.

The first time Aaron noticed Robert's freckles was when he had the older man shoved up against that wall. Angry and wanting. The freckles that adorned Robert's face were mostly faded, the winter months having guarded them, but still noticeable against his pale skin. That night Aaron dreamt of tanned skin, broad shoulder and galaxies of freckles.

The first time Aaron got a hand on Robert's freckles was up in his bedroom at The Woolpack. There were no gentle caresses or tracing patterns, only rough clawing and burning touches. He couldn't see the freckles in the dark, but Aaron knew they were there, scattered across Robert's back, just waiting to be explored, to be loved - _the kind of love Aaron was so desperate to give Robert._

The first time Aaron gots the chance to really roam Robert's freckles was in the barn, the second time. Only hours earlier Aaron had made a single New Year’s resolution: to stay away from engaged men. Yet there he'd found himself, hidden away in some filthy barn, with Robert tucked under his arm, soft snores tickling Aaron's chest, making his heart flutter along. It was in that moment that Aaron decided he wanted to count all of Robert's freckles, connect then like constellations. He’d begun counting them, got up to number 17 before the shrilling sound of Robert's phone shattered the silence.

And then there was the week at Home Farm, the week they dedicated to exploring every inch of each other; bodies, minds and hearts. Aaron basked in the feeling of waking up in Robert's arms, the feeling of _safety and belonging and_ _home_. He didn’t mind that he was an early riser, waking an hour or so before Robert most days, because it gave him the chance to be ridiculously soft. And with the village was on the cusps of summer that week, a gentle tan had soaked Robert's body, bringing along a flurry of once-hidden freckles out with it. It was on the last morning that Aaron finally completed the task he’d been attempting for months; counting the freckles on Robert's back - **_78_**  . The number of years Aaron wanted to spend waking up next to Robert.

And then they were happy, they were so happy and Aaron knew every speck of Robert like the back of his own hand. But happiness doesn’t last forever. The break-up came and Aaron had nightmares each night; about monsters and loneliness and all the things he feared without Robert by his side. but mostly, he had nightmares about forgetting the freckles on Robert’s face.

And then there’s now; married twice over and in love twice as long. It’s midday and they’re still in bed, naked and sweaty and completely unguarded. All the things Aaron would only ever be with Robert. Robert is leant up above him, their faces millimetres apart and hearts joined in the middle. Aaron takes a hand up to Robert's face and runs his fingers over his cheekbone. It feels like he’s running his hand through the dust of a thousand stars and galaxies, light touches tracing each one as if Robert's skin is sprinkled with flecks of gold.

He moves his hand down then, lower and lower and lower, until it’s resting gently on Robert's chest, on his heart. His chest is covered in little golden flakes and Aaron can’t help but make constellations out of them, drawing patterns and making Robert laugh. but out of all the constellation in the world, _this is by far the most beautiful his eyes have ever seen._


	18. robron & rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some affair era angst and fluff !!! for my favourite hannah in the world xo

The quiet rhythms of the raindrops beat against the wood like a miniature drum, producing a quite rattle in their space. but it’s not profound enough to drown out the sounds of Aaron's restless panting. he’s already slipping off into that strange, liminal space between sleep and not quite that only a round of mind-blowing sex with Robert can take him too. but Robert isn’t done with him, yet.

He’s hovering over Aaron, eyes intense and wild and Robert can see the glow of Aaron's cheeks even in the darkened barn. He half suspects that if he pressed a hand to them, they would burn him. Not a slow, aching burn, rather an all-consuming, sharp burn you don’t see coming. _Just like he didn’t see Aaron coming._

But he’s had time now. Time to think about Aaron's words. _Aaron's three words._ Words that he threw right back in Aaron’s face when all he wanted to do was let them settle in his heart. They’re settled on Robert's tongue now.

_“I love you.” Robert breathes “god, I love you.”_

And Aaron can’t hide the smile that splits his face; it’s too big and too wild, and the world is too small to contain such a thing, so he doesn’t even try. He just smiles and smiles and smiles; into the night, the hole in the old barn roof causing him no worries. It should scare him - scare them both - knowing the moon can see them, the stars and the fireflies too, but it doesn’t matter because Robert loves him.

_Robert loves him._

Impossible, he thinks, before shutting his eyes tightly and burying his face in Robert's shoulder. Not impossible. But real, very real.

Robert kisses him then, bruises Aaron's and his own lips, trying to push the words into Aaron's mouth with his tongue. I love you. I love you. I love you. Robert hopes the words will take hold there, plant themselves a home in Aaron's mouth and grow roses one day. Maybe he’ll choke on the stems and the vines will lace in to his rib-cage, maybe they’ll die and Aaron's heart will rot away with them and it will all be Robert's fault. Because he’s selfish and greedy. And he loves Aaron.

_No. he loves Chrissie._

 

_He does, he loves her._

 

_But,_

 

_he’s in love with Aaron._


	19. robron & choose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the lovely gemma requested this on tumblr. love u gemma x

Aaron remembers their first kiss, the second kiss, the third, and every kiss after that. He also remembers how they end; abruptly and with uncertainty, but perhaps that’s what draws him back time and time again.

It’s hard to find time to themselves these days, real, substantial, time when there’s no threat of someone walking in on them. No threat of nagging wives or over-protective mothers catching them in the act and exploding the little life they’ve built themselves this past week.

Aaron doesn’t think it’s possible to ever forget this feeling, the way it is to have every bone inside his body individually pulled apart, Robert’s fingers clutching at the skin of his chest and tearing it off, releasing the myriad of galaxies hidden behind Aaron’s scars and tears.

Being here, with Robert, this week, is the first time he’s ever felt flowers blooming inside himself, as if Aarons worthy of having a whole garden litter his chest. It’s the first time he feels like he wants simultaneously giving everything he has, and then take everything he’s offered.

The late April humidity is flowing through the air in waves, travelling along the bare field of the village. It twists and swirls its way up the side of the large house, the one so foreign to Aaron, yet so familiar with Robert here. A slight breeze travels through the open windows of the bedroom up at home farm, past the sheer plum-coloured curtains, and settles into the atmosphere. They’re lying on Robert’s bed, skin slightly sticky from the oppressive heat; a mixture of the day’s soaring temperatures and a heat that’s entirely their own.

The room beings to cool as the sun makes its journey from the sky to the darkening horizon, and Aaron stares at the ceiling. He just states and stares and over-thinks. Robert’s breaths are shallow beside him, warm and ever-present against Aaron’s shoulders and all he wants is to curl into Robert’s warmth. But he can’t. He can’t, because one day the heat is going to kill him.

Robert is, put simply, the best thing to ever happen to Aaron and he doesn’t know what love is but he thinks that this might be it.  _He knows that this is it._ Whether or not he deserves it, is another thing.

But Aaron’s selfish when it comes to Robert. he’s ruining lives and his own too but he doesn’t care. He just wants Robert to be his. His and his only.

And now he’s had a week, a week of Robert, unguarded and completely Aaron’s, he wants it forever.

He turns then, calls Robert’s name softly and breaks the calm with a question that has the ability to shatter all: “ _In another life, would you choose me?”_

“ _I’d_   _choose you in this one, Aaron”_

And that’s not at all the response Aaron was expecting. He studies Robert then, takes in the way his eyes reflect nothing but sincerity, the way he’s biting his lower lip as if he’s nervous, and the light blush dusting his cheeks that signals he’s just put his heart on the line. They both have.

They go back and fourth for a while then, the  _ **you wouldn’t**_ and _ **I would**  _argument is relentless until Aaron snaps. “ _You could have chosen me Robert, time and time again - you still could, but you won’t. And it breaks my fucking heart but it’s fine, I’ve accepted now.”_

_“Why? Why do you settle for this?”_

“B _ecause I love you.”_

 

 

And for now, that’s enough.


	20. you're a wave of a dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anon prompted fluff & aaron kissing robert's nose.
> 
> it turned into humour a bit more than anything but it's still fluffy!!!! 
> 
> title from kiss - pale waves

The first time it happens is a complete accident.

Robert had whisked Aaron away to some fancy hotel for the night, desperate to get him on his own. Only, it didn’t exactly go to plan. 

He had this brilliant idea to wine and dine Aaron before having his wicked way with him. But the bottomless champagne the hotel had to offer was seemingly too much for Aaron to handle. 

Because now he was drunk.  _So bloody drunk._

It soon became clear Robert wasn’t getting that shag he was angling for all night. He surprised himself when he found he didn’t care, though. The truth of it is, he’d rather have this. These moments when it feels like they’re the only two people in the world.  _AaronandRobert._

The bubbles brought out a side of Aaron Robert barely saw. He seemed so relaxed, content and dare Robert say - _stupidly happy._ The sight was enough to have Robert’s own fears and worries melt on his tongue; fizzling down his throat with the last drop of the golden liquid. 

“You gonna take me back to our room and show me a good time then, Mr Sugden?” Aaron said, slurring his words slightly as he leaned across the table, a clumsy hand brushing against Robert’s cheek. 

“You’ll be lucky if you even make it back to the room, mate,” Robert replied as he stood from his seat before attempting to lift Aaron from his own. 

“What d’ya mean,” Aaron exasperated, “‘m not even that drunk, don’t be so dramatic.” 

“Aaron, you’re  _so_  drunk.” Robert almost snorted.

“Yeah well, if I am  _\- if -_  then it’s your fault!” Aaron replied, stumbling slightly.

“I thought it might be,” Robert laughed, the pair of them exiting the hotel’s restaurant on unsteady feet. 

Robert, himself, was just toying on this side of tipsy. It’s not that he hadn’t enjoyed the champagne, quite the opposite actually, but he’d wanted to keep at least half an eye on Aaron. In case Robert needed to - you know - convince Aaron that swinging from the chandeliers was not a good idea.  _Or something._

They were making their way towards the lifts, slowly, when Aaron softened under Robert’s hold. “Thank you,” He said, looping his arms around Robert’s neck as they stood at the lift entrance, waiting for the obnoxious ping to alter them of its arrival. 

“What for? Helping you discover your taste for the expensive stuff?”

“ _No!_  It tastes of piss anyway,” Aaron grinned. “I meant thank you for this, _tonight_. I think we needed some time alone, to just - well - just be us.”

“Yeah. It’s been the best.” Robert replied honestly. _Maybe too honestly._ “Now let’s get you to bed - you lightweight!” 

They step - stumble - into the lift and Aaron is on Robert before the doors have even closed. Hands roaming in places they shouldn’t be able to find so easily. “Now I do like the sound of that,” Aaron smirked, an attempt at a sultry smile covering his face. And Robert would be a liar if he said it didn’t make his knees weak. 

“To sleep!” He reminded,  _“Idiot.”_

“Spoilsports.” Aaron murmured, breath ghosting over Robert’s jawline. Robert clung to Aaron’s waist as he lost himself in the moment, eyes fluttering shut against his will.

Robert licks his lips, pouting them slightly for what he knows is coming next. They’ve done these hundreds of times, _him and Aaron_ , this push and pull. It’s all part of the thrill. He feels Aaron’s lips within seconds, soft and addictive.

Only, he doesn’t find them where he’s expecting them. 

Instead, Aaron had planted them against the tip of Robert’s nose, completely misjudging the structure of Robert’s face. 

“Whoops!” Aaron exclaimed, a slight blush creeping up his face.  _Even in his drunken haze, he was still the same old Aaron._

“You’re an idiot,” Robert snorted, despite the rush of affection he felt at the silly gesture. 

 

 

 

 

 

_And yeah, no one’s saying that (non-accidental) nose kisses became their thing after that, but …. they did._


	21. i shiver with the look you gave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the morning is quiet, a strangely calm day made of bright lights and chirping birds, the only sounds being the lull noise of the tv and the glide of their tongues while they lick into each other’s mouths. 
> 
> or, husbands enjoying an empty home and each others hands

Aaron looked up from his mobile as he heard the front door open, surprised that Robert was home early. He knew his husband was arriving home from his business trip today (of course he did, he’d been counting down the days since Robert left on Monday morning), he just hadn’t been expecting him until late afternoon.

But here was Robert, home before eleven am.

“You’re home early,” Aaron questions, unable to mask the sheer elation from his voice. “Wasn’t expecting you till later.” 

“Well, I can always go away again and come back in a few hours?” Robert teases as he closes the front door behind him. Aaron’s up from the sofa in seconds, three long strides and he’s in front of Robert, hands finding their home on his hips instantly. 

“Don’t you dare.” Aaron states, cupping Robert’s face in his left hand, slowly stroking his cheeks. He places a kiss on Robert’s lips; it’s warm - warm like the summer heat now that they’re back together. 

“Why don’t you sit down and I’ll make us a brew?” Aaron offers as Robert slumps himself down on the sofa, legs spread and smile crooked.

“Or,” Robert draws out, and Aaron recognises his game straight away, “you could come and join me?”

Aaron ponders if for a second, weighs up the pros and cons; _a warm cuppa or a warm mouth._

And yeah, he lets himself fall onto Robert’s body almost instantly, sprawling on top of his lap, legs pressing against the outside of his thighs. He gets close, closer, close enough to brush his lips against Robert’s, teasing softly, until the skin of his lips tingles with _want._

“I’m so glad you’re home”, he whispers, lets his tongue finally brush Robert’s bottom lip, dipping inside before putting some distance between their mouths again. Aaron curls his fingers around the over-grown hairs at his husband’s nape, allowing his hand to rest there, locking him in place.

He can feel Robert’s gaze on him, laser-focused and burning on his skin, and just like that the atmosphere changes, electrically charged. It still sends the same shivers through his body, all these years later. He can feel it, his body reacting now, too - heat pooling low in his belly, mouth dry, the throbbing of his heartbeat underneath his joggers, swelling, making it hard to focus on anything that isn’t Robert’s already naked chest beneath his hands.

The morning is quiet, a strangely calm day made of bright lights and chirping birds, the only sounds being the lull noise of the tv and the glide of their tongues while they lick into each other’s mouths. 

Robert’s mouth is scalding hot where it brushes against his cheek, tracing the stubble of his jaw in a string of wet kisses, and Aaron feels like he’s drowning.

Everything feels blurred, electric in a way. Robert’s hands circle his back, pressing his body upwards until Aaron can feel the line of his cock rubbing against his stomach, and just the feeling of it is so heady he can’t help but shift his hips forward, letting out a breathy moan that Robert swallows reverently, licking into his mouth without rush.

It’s ridiculous, the way in which Aaron’s body craves his husband’s touch. The way it sings whenever Robert slides his tongue across the dips and valleys of his collarbones, just like now, flipping them over and pushing Aaron down gently on the sofa. Robert kisses down his body like it’s made of glass, not missing a spot, hands softly spreading his thighs and cradling his body while they kiss. Aaron aches for it, each and every time, the sweetness and torture of it. 

Robert paints him like a blank canvas, threading touches and strokes until everything feels like bursts of colour on Aaron’s jagged skin.

Robert kisses down his chest then, biting into the flesh of his hips, thighs, and closer still. It’s almost unbearable, the sight of Robert’s head bracketed between his legs, edging closer to the crease where they meet the line of his hips - but somehow it’s not enough, tonight, so Aaron pulls him up again, closer, grabs his hair and kisses him so hard it might bruise.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Robert voices. 

Aaron stops sucking kisses on Robert’s throat for an instant, stunned by his words. He doesn’t dare meet Robert’s eyes, not when he knows exactly how they’ll look _: wild, dark, sincere._  He stays where he is instead, face buried in his chest and eyes closed. 

“So much. Hate bein’ away from you”, Robert adds, nudging the side of his face with his nose.

Aaron rolls his eyes fondly. “Shut up, idiot, you’ve only been gone a few days.”

Robert brings his face closer, brushing his lips softly against the corner of Aaron’s mouth, evidently losing himself in the burn of stubble. “I mean it, I’ve missed you. Your laugh,” he says, sliding soft fingers against the curve of Aaron’s smile. “Your mouth”, dragging the tips until they press against his bottom lip, letting them travel further down, settling on his leg, stroking it softly. “Your thighs. Everything.”

Aaron feels drunk. On Robert, on the bright light of a new day. There’s a dizziness in his veins and his head and his heart. “Oh, yeah? Everything?”

“Everything”, Robert concludes, looking Aaron in the eye. Kissing his chin, his nose, his forehead. “Especially your dick, though.”

“Smooth, really smooth, Sugden.”

“Sugden-Dingle to you, thank you very much.”

It’s indescribable, this feeling, being pinned down by Robert’s weight and stare and love all at the same time. It’s something he should be used, he’s been on the receiving end of all three many times, but he doesn’t think the weight of Robert’s love will ever settle. 

Aaron can feel tears building in the corner of his eyes, knows how ridiculous it actually would be to cry over something like this, his husband arriving home after a mere four days away, so he grabs Robert’s jaw and does the only thing he can think of that will make it stop. 

“Hey, don’t do that,” Robert says. “I want you to look at me.”

Aaron shakes his head. He can’t do that. If he looks now, sees that mouth open, tongue flickering, watches Robert’s eyes burn into him; he’s going to lose it.

“I can’t,” he says. “Robert, please.”

He tilts his head up, asking for a kiss, and when Robert complies Aaron tosses them around so he’s back on top and kisses Robert again. It’s dirty, open-mouthed, so slow that every glide of their tongues seems to last forever. Aaron tries to make it fast, intense, grinding his hips until Robert becomes pliant under his body so his feelings get lost in the tide.  

“You have no idea how much I want you right now,” Robert says, and yeah, Aaron reckons he does; he feels it too. 

Everything becomes a blur after that. They’re naked before Aaron can determine the changes around them, skin gliding against skin, sweaty and warm, Robert still pinned underneath his body. Everything feels slowed down, pressing down on his chest, like trying to move underwater. 

“God - Rob,” Aaron moans, strangled, because he can’t help it, and looks down pointedly. His cock lying heavy and dark on his stomach, and Robert reaches out for it before Aaron can process anything.

His touch is immediate and breathtakingly gorgeous. 

Robert is two fingers deep, working until the slide is effortless, when Aaron’s head finally flies away, buzzed, letting his body take control until Robert’s inside him and everything still. All he can do is try to keep his eyes open, failing spectacularly in the process, all while trying to keep up the slow, tight circles of his hips.

“So good. Rob you’re so-” Aaron whimpers, and whatever he wants to say next gets lost in a moan when Robert crooks his fingers just right. And yeah, Aaron is lost in a sea of long fingers and hot palms. 

It’s too much. So much, all of a sudden. It floods Aaron like no one but Robert has the power to do.

His heart is going to explode, fly off his ribcage, he’s sure of it.

The third finger has Aaron clutching onto the back on the sofa, arms  flexing as he clenches his fingers tight around the cushions. Robert’s strokes are slow as he spreads his fingers carefully, Aaron’s whimpers fading into moans, breath by breath, and as Robert rubs over his prostate deliberately, Aaron’s arm shake against the sofa.

“Aaron, I -” Robert starts, and Aaron’s grateful he sounds just as wrecked as Aaron feels. He doesn’t even let Robert finish, licks the words desperately right from his tongue, breathing into his opened mouth when coordination seems almost an impossible feat. “I know,“ he whispers, overwhelmed, almost a whimper. “I know.”

Aaron knows. He feels it. Burning on his skin like fire, licking from the inside. Robert doesn’t stop staring at him, eyes locked, noses touching. Aaron can feel every moan and gasp, swallows them down like his favourite beer, but nothing has ever tasted of invincibility like this.

“Love you”, Aaron mumbles, picking up the pace of his relentless movements, tingles shooting up his spine in waves when Robert brushes his fingers against him just right, right over that spot that makes him feel like stars are bursting behind his eyelids. “Just – don’t stop - please don’t -“ 

He doesn’t get to finish, because Robert twists his fingers just so, in that way he knows Aaron particularly likes, and instead of words, Aaron lets out a helpless groan. 

He feels like his insides are liquefying, like his head might blow right off and his body would still be thrumming.

The tip of Robert’s free hand traces the line of Aaron’s cheekbones, thumb pinching slightly his lower lip, gasping with every rock of Aaron’s hips. “I love you too,” he’s panting now against his ear, but Aaron is so lost in his own head it almost doesn’t register. 

Robert uses his knee to spread Aaron’s thighs wider then, softly whilst twisting his fingers to meet Aaron’s movements. Aaron feels wild with it, heat pooling undeniably low in his stomach. He comes into Robert’s fist, bites his lip before Robert’s finger set it free and Aaron lets himself moan against his husband’s shoulder, hips stuttering until they come to a halt. 

Aaron feels his own body overheat, sweaty, perfectly blissed out. He can still feel the ghost of Robert’s fingers on the dip of his hips.

“Maybe we should grab a shower, you know”, he murmurs, words blurring between them. Robert just grunts in response.

_“Hmm.“_

“Hmm?” Aaron asks, looking up from Robert’s heated his chest, grinning lightly.

Robert’s answering smile is as blinding as the stars.

“Or maybe, you could repay the favour,” Robert resolves in the end, closing his eyes and pressing a kiss over the top of Aaron’s head.

“I suppose I could”, Aaron nods, letting his head rest against Robert’s chest with a thud, tracing patterns on the skin of his chest. “In the shower, though?”

When Robert laughs, his chest vibrates and Aaron can feel it thrum against his chest, like the softest of strings.

“You’ve got yourself a deal, Mr Sugden-Dingle,” Robert replies, detangling their legs. 

**Author's Note:**

> i'm @dingletragedy on tumblr if anyone wants to say hi x


End file.
